Living in the Lap of Luxury

I got up this morning (yes, kids, I actually slept at night... I'm shocked too) and went into the bathroom, as is the usual course of action upon my awakening, to be greeted with the oddest of surprises in my toilet bowl. My blurry morning vision made me look twice as I attempted to figure out what it was. At first, I thought someone had left a floater and it had threaded out overnight as they often can do... but as my vision cleared, I realized exactly what I was looking at: a mouse... face down... drowned in my toilet. What the f***? This has made me seriously wonder about my level of living.

I am well aware that I fit into the lower class of this country. I am well aware that this shanty in which I live is far from excellent accommodations. However, I am becoming more and more disturbed by the skyrocketing rodent suicide rate here. I mean, first you had the mouse that killed itself in the window fan, and now a mouse that drowns itself in the toilet. Either there's a mouse mafia disposing of informants, or even the mice that live here are depressed about their home.

My morning took another delightful turn when I attempted to take a picture of the drowned mouse in the toilet prior to disposing of it. I grabbed my digital camera and attempted to fire it up... to only be met with failure. I assumed the battery was dead and would have to be charged. So, I grabbed my trusty backup: the HP Photosmart 318, a camera I hate due only to the fact that it uses AA batteries (very quickly). I tried to turn it on... failure. I grabbed 4 fresh AA's and loaded them up. I attempted to turn it on... failure! Oh, for f***'s sake!

Yes, I'm living in the lap of luxury.

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Big Cray: Accept No Substitute